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breathless submission by =nox-paradigm:iconnox-paradigm:





though storms scream through the night
blighting out the moon,
she sings, beauty unrivaled
by sparrow or raven filled branches.
through fires burning in her heart,
she was the one to tear her tears
through the concrete floor,
feeding through the cracks, roars
of roots demanding sunlight.
she was the one with fingers
stained
blood red, protruding smoke;
inhale.
paranoid dreams aching for release,
stimulus, submission;
she spins inside the fog
waiting for her knight
shining bright, behind closed doors;
whispering golden soliloquies
wrapped in absolution.

time streches on, cubed in four
upon the floor, etched in stains,
sacred rights;
a chemical stench
through which the door opens wide.
inside: baphomet with one eye spies
the silver maiden,
dressed in rags of purple
dancing wretched in miseria;
dances pale beneath the naked moon,
exhale.
she shines for him to see,
she glows for him to be the one
captured in the dim light
which only he can see.

and then the laughter,
drowning out the sorrows
drowning her
in miseria.
©2005-2009 =nox-paradigm
:iconnox-paradigm:

Author's Comments

dancing through the smoke, she falls breathless before her knight

dig the new ss by my good friend and lover *Ameas-Qua :D

Comments


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:iconairmega23:
Very good job here. I like the flow of the poem. You did a good job here with your puncuation. The flow was very controlled, and I like how you directed the reader in the proper way to read the text. The piece sounded beautiful read aloud, although I think your use of alliteration also added to that.
The imagary here is also very well done. I enjoyed the deatailed picture your created for your audience. It added something very tangable to the piece. Great use of emotion, imagery and diction.

Greg

--
To be positive at all times is to ignore all that is important sacred or valuable...
To be negative at all times is to be threatened by ridiculousness and instant discredibility...

-Kurt Cobain [1967-1994]
:iconathenarules:
I am absolutely Swwwwooooonnnnniing!! This is magnetic and majestic, I want to clime it like a summit, but I guess I will just read it again.....this is truly beautiful not in a nandy pandy type of way either. Cool ss too :)

--
You can't kill a woman that was born to hang.
:iconnox-paradigm:
that's one of the more flattering comments i've received in a while, thank you very much. i'm glad you enjoyed :)
:iconnox-paradigm:
wow thank you :) i wasn't expecting such a reaction on this piece from everyone
:iconairmega23:
Was not a problem, i enjoy commenting on good work.

Hope you can read my newest work too. on the days of grandeur

--
To be positive at all times is to ignore all that is important sacred or valuable...
To be negative at all times is to be threatened by ridiculousness and instant discredibility...

-Kurt Cobain [1967-1994]
:iconawi:
i was working up the comment omg whiner

i like the title! i wrote something that that title would work with but i never posted it and now i wont cause i dun wanna copy you :p

--
touch me
:iconladynyk:
I love it.. too tired to be more wordy. Your words are always an intense experience. I like that.

--
Nyk

Check out ~ekg His words weave the mundane into magick..
--------------------------------
Member of ~dark-writing

\"I Tell You: One must still have chaos in one to give birth to a dancing star!\" ~ Nietzsche
:iconameas-qua:
All i can say is:

travelling along a spiralling notion.
Something powered by cyclones and jet fuel,
chocking on a sunday morning dew.

I watched a beautiful rose, dance on its own petals,
eroding itself against the shard of glass beneath its feet.

and i cried.

--
Ameas Qua.
:iconkamijisatsu:
-Hates on your talent.

/=

Details

February 26, 2005
1.3 KB
59.6 KB
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